Oh Nick, lighten up. There are other people in the world; some of them even go the cinema. They don't do any harm. Some people have trouble keeping still for 2 hours: does that mean they can't go to the flicks? I think your "other half" sounds well adjusted....

I feel your pain. But the solutions are likely to be worse than the problem: I don't want bouncers intimidating the audience, and (as you say) banning children from showings is more like revenge than a practical measure.

Mind you – our new library seems to allow any level of noise, it's certainly not for quiet reading any more. Perhaps it's just how 'society' is now..

Harry (Norwich, UK)

I totally sympathise. It happens here in Greece as well. Potato chips eaters (close your mouths when crunching those things, please!), people kicking on the back of my seat as they cross their legs and even when they are not crossing their legs, people talking to each other loudly when the musical soundtrack reaches high decibel volume because they think the soundtrack will drown out their talking but actually it doesn't, oh, I could go on... So first I wait, then start sending out angry looks and finally speak out. Most of the time it works, if it doesn't I change seats but the whole thing makes me sick and angry and it takes my attention away from the movie, which makes me angrier.

What bothers me most is the volume level of the sound track. It's rarely too soft, it's almost always too loud.

My friend, I would welcome any noisy movie theater in Manhattan (where I'm from) compared to what I've endured living in Puerto Rico for the past three years! My wife and I went to see Pride and Glory a few weeks ago..... I didn't realize it would be such a popular among toddlers!

I can relate.....I stopped going to the cinema for years when in the US because of annoying people in the audience, the disgusting smell of buttered popcorn and slurping soda's from straws! And then after moving to Valence, France I tried their 'original version/arty' cinema and was hooked........no refreshments (perfect!) and rarely is there a word spoken through entire films, including credits. I appreciated this for my almost 5 years there.

The sheer joy of watching a movie, preferably the first show, in a large-screen movie theater... beats any irritants, from anyone else in the audience.

However, my pet peeves are: Cellphones in Theaters [there should be signal blockers in theater halls!], Old Ladies having to go thrice to the Loo during a 2-hour movie, Commentaries on what's coming up in the next 5 minutes from someone sitting behind me who has already watched the movie 5 times, children in sombre-artsy adult-oriented movies [get a baby-sitter, pleeeease!].

Happy viewing to all.

I also had my viewing of Terence Davies' film ruined at the Curzon cinema. I was trying to get comfortable in my seat and this guy in front of me kept turning around and scowling at me. I could sense him seething and I found the whole experience quite disturbing. I couldn't keep still in my seat.

This really amuses me, so many people I know complain about going to the movies because of all of the above! I think we just have to accept that if you put 50-100 people in a room that is supposed to be quiet then people will disappoint! It's not human nature to be quiet (or still for that matter) for long periods of time. The answer could be – wrapper free snacks and bottle only drinks – or stay at home and wait for the release on DVD!

I can easily understand the torture you've been through. In my corner of the world, I've had the distinct experience of asking the security personnel of a cinema to evict a group of giggling high school girls who turned the theater into free-for-all chat room about boys and school life. My solution to the problem of clucky chickens in the room: watch the movie on a weekday afternoon. The cinemas here in the Philippines are almost empty during those times. I had the pleasure of watching a movie by myself. My own private home-theater for the whole two hours, lifting my feet to the back rest of the seat in-front; munching on the bucket of popcorn (quietly, of course), and sipping on a half-liter soda (quietly too). I laughed, I cried at the appropriate moments. It was heaven on earth. And ever since, I always watched movies at those times. I leave the cinema house enriched and enlightened by the portrayal of the human condition.

BRAVO NICK !!
Rude people at a film drive more of us nuts than you can imagiine. I stopped going to the Theatre to see a film in 2000 after a group of teens were laughing and talking through the whole thing. The investment in a 60 inch flat screen and 6.1 surround. with Bluray was well worth it. Silence to watch a film – what a novelty....

Honestly (and I don't want to sound cheap here) but I am really annoyed before I get into the movie by the cost of everything. I can take my girl out to four-star dining for the same amount i am paying for the movie and concessions. then add the annoyances around you when your actually in the movie you paid a mint for and you really feel ripped-off. I try to always be quiet and polite when I get in, making sure to eat carefully so I don't make too much noise, but I always seem to get stuck in front of the guy that insists on jamming his feet on the back of my chair.

I rarely go to the movies anymore.

Haven't been inside a cinema for 30 years. Just got too irritating. Much prefer being curled up on my own counch with a rental. The cinema is bound for the dustbin of history, an invention made for people but ultimately killed off by people. Good riddance!

Candy wrappers – nothing drives me wilder! Odeon Cinemas are apparently going to introduce popcorn-free sessions, but surely refreshment stands could be stocked with sweets wrapped in waxed paper – 90% less rustling – then everyone is happy!

Nick Hunt is a puffed up frog!! Leave the kids along and stay at home with your dvds and your slippers granddad!

Dear Nick,
Since misery loves company, let me tell you what happened to me while attending an opera at the quaint and impressive Municipal Theatre in São Paulo: at the climax of the romantic scene between Samson and Delilah (by Saint-Saens), the person sitting next to me offered me candy, reiterating that it was there should I fancy it (loud and clear)!.
More infuriating than that only the ring of a mobile phone during the very sad and last notes of a Tchaikovsky symphony...

My last movie at the cinemas was .... I don' remember, maybe 20 years ago, now the animals that infest the exhibition rooms are just plain scum, and I have better things to do in life than get upset by monstruous teenagers from hell .

Usually I wait for the DVD – Here in Germany you usually get 20 to 30 minutes of advertising before the movie begins, then there is a break where the "ushers", (who no longer usher), come through selling ice cream – and then, only then does the movie begin. Occasionally if a movie is "over-long", (in excess of two hours), there is even a 15 to 20 minute admission so you can go buy some more munchies and take a WC break. With either the long or short version of a movie you have to tolerate the talkers and the back-jabbers.
We have also discovered the matinee. These are far more peaceful and in some cases a bit less expensive, especially if we can attend during the week. Weekend movies cost a chunk more.
Thanks for the commentary, Nick. Even if some disagree, I think you have the right of it.

Fools who clap at a "touching" moment in a movie - get a life!

I don't just stare at people. I get up and go over and in a normal voice ask a man to please leave he simply must have the cellphone conversation (as happened, which was even more irritating since I couldn't eavesdrop on the conversation that was in a language I didn't know), or ask the young man to stop his twice-a-minute LOUD guffaws because the attention is on the screen, not on him, or shouldn't be on him.

Shaming the lady behind me with a pound of crinkly candy wrappers (after the candy was eaten) was a bit more trouble until I crossed my hands behind my head, elbows high. It's the way I lean back on the couch at home. I figured if she could act like she was the only person in the room, well, so could I.

When she leaned forward to ask me to lower my arms, I said, "if you promise to stop assaulting my ears with he need to eat every candy on earth all at once in the same movie theater, I will stop assaulting your vision with parts of my body".

I've noticed that the one minute of time lost in the movie for me and a lot of other people is well worth the effort, but also that you have to do it early in the show, or it doesn't matter. Once I got a small round of applause from movie-goers!

If you sit there stewing in your irriation., you are just another sheep and deserve to learn on-the-spot anger management skills. At least for two hours, it is possible to teach some people manners.

I usually don't have too much of a problem...except children, small children, in movies where they probably shouldn't be. Especially babies.

A baby started crying during a movie once, I fairly certain it was something loud and violent, and my friend asked out loud so everyone could hear, "Can you turn off your baby?"

It was fantastic, and completely made up for everything.

Having a quiet cinema to watch a movie is great! I dislike inconsiderate movie goers too.

So my solution is to usually wait for a couple of weeks after the film is out and the crowd has died down, before watching the movie. And I'd definitely avoid weekends.

Agree with most of your comments. Disagree with your spelling. It is Polanski.

p.s. you forgot to mention the guy behind you who somehow gets the joke just this tiny bit later than everyone else did and burst out laughing just this tiny bit (about 2 seconds) too late; especially irritating in the theatre.

I have been a movie freak all my life, but at the same time, I haven't been to a public theater in literally DECADES.

All the distractions of rude self-centered jerks making noise, talking etc. are absolutely too much for someone like me who likes to get engrossed and "lost" in a great film and hates distractions. And this was BEFORE cellphones. I would probably be serving time for manslaughter if there had been cellphones in theaters 30+ years ago.

Solution: Thank God for Netflix, cable, On-Demand, and home theater. I can watch a great quality print on a big screen with audio under my control – undisturbed – and enjoy the movie the way the director intended.

The only tradeoff is I have to wait a few months for public release on DVD. And it doesn't bother me at all. It's easily worth the tradeoff. Much cheaper also, and I can watch, replay, still, as much as I like.

Bottom line: until cell phones are jammed / banned in theaters and people start having some respect for others around them who paid to enjoy the film (fat chance, human nature being what it is) – there is no way in hell I'm going to waste my time and money on an exercise in frustration.

I hate when people around you is: a) guessing aloud what`s coming on; b) saw the movie before and explain it to someone else; c) frustrated screenwriters who criticize every turn of the movie.

Hell is other people.
-Jean-Paul Sartre

Whar really bathers me are those that sit behind you and start making dumb remarks about the previews and then continue with their silly jokes. You try not to listen but, sometimes the noise is so loud you just can't concetrate on what you're hearing. If you say something to them they look at you as if you were a weirdo or something and sometimes even get violent. But I feel we should speak out . It's our right. We are paying just like they are.

I propose that a respectable movie theater displays before the movie begins 3 slides about keeping quiet and feet movement. I think this is legit education for people who were noteducated by their parents and hence have kept some of Darwin's described legacy.

There is the option to go in prime time and expect the annoyance from masses. It's fun to be among lots and lots of people and take 15 minutes to leave the car park afterwards.

But who would go to a nice movie in prime time with or without the missie? I have had many times the whole theater for me alone, I just choose the time that is most inconvenient for everybody else. I find the joy from watching movies in this manner to be infinitely more immense than my personal high tech home theater and/or the joy from being among the masses.

I myself rarely go to the theaters anymore, as I prefer watching at home. However, there are times when a group outing is called for, at which point i simply enjoy being with my friends, and make a mental note to get the DVD if it halfway interests me. But yes, some people can be very annoying in theaters – not to say that I haven't done it myself, but at least with not so much abandon. I also agree with JR – if I can find time during a weekday afternoon to watch – or have the first screening of the day (here in the Philippines, the worst crowds on the weekends come in after lunch), then yes, I would.

It's bad enough when the above happens at a movie theater, but increasingly it also occurs at classical concerts and the opera, as well!

I get the annoyance about people talking, kicking seats and not turning off their cell phones, but expecting people to eat silently is unrealistic. And you're unlikely to get much support from the theatre since ticket sales have historically only helped theatres to break even - they rely on the food to make their profits. If you've got that serious a personal issue with the sound of people eating then you're going to have to either find a way to go see your films on Tuesdays at 11 a.m. (believe me, the theatre will be deserted) or wait until the DVD comes out.

As to children, you kind of ask for them if you see a weekend matinee. Go after 8 and there aren't too many kids around.

Nothing still beats cellphone ringing and people sending SMS during the movie. Did I mention people telling the ending of the film?

What this blog is about is sooo true. For the last twenty years, I didn't put a feet in a movie theater. "Nothing, but nothing, hurts more than having a movie screening wrecked". Ya !!! The worst of it is in Africa or India, don't go see a movie overthere, you'll just hear the comments of the crowd. The quieter place is in Japan where everybody respect the intimacy of the other. Anyway, since then (except in Japan and in France), I just seat in my comfi living rroom and look at movies on TV or DVD.

ACTORS MAKING 20 MILLION DOLLARS A PICTURE

Come and live in France you can be 99% sure to watch your film in silence............just a question of respect!!

Headphones. Movie theaters have to start to give moviegoers Bose-headphones for audio, which would solve many problems.

I think it speaks volumes for the civilisation of a country that only Japan and France can be trusted to have some respect for their fellow movie-goer. They are both (Japan especially) the most civilised cultures I've ever been exposed to.

As for the unruly yobs that make up OUR culture, I think it's up to the cinemas to enforce silence on these morons that are otherwise unable to SHUT-UP for 2 hours.

Home theatre and blu-ray is all very well but it'll never match getting totally lost in a movie on a BIG screen.

I people are incappable of sitting down and shutting up for the duration of a movie, without forcing unpleasant smelling food through their bovine mouths then they should be slaughtered without mercy.

If I may add this to my earlier post: I grew up considering cinema-going as an important social occasion. That was in the fifties and early 60s Cairo (Egypt) where, by the way, several movie theaters were wonderful, air-conditionned 40s art-deco edifices, showing thew latest Hollywood-produced fare. Lately and especially because of the often annoying, unrespectful behaviour of others, I have begrudgingly started to accept that I may have to let my cinema-going, well, go. Yes, in early matinee shows things are much better but the deserted theater reminds me exactly of this: I am alone. I want well behaved, attentive crowds so we can all collectively sigh, laugh and be part of something communal. But that was then. Now, as excellent independent television productions are available, I go to the movies less and less.

In the good old days you had ushers who came around and if someone was making noise, pulled them and they didn't get to ruin it for anyone else. You could also go and complain to these ushers who would then turn up 5 mins later and catch those you were complaining about. What happened to these wonderful ushers and their powers to ban people from movies and even from the theatre if they wouldn't go quietly. Bring back ushers with the power to remove people I say. Its inexcusable to annoy others during a movie screening especially with the price it currently costs.

You say you don't want to move, "Why should I?" I think the answer to your own question is you should because it is bothering you so much.
It would be an easy way to rid yourself of what irks you, something in your power to do.

That is what I do when someone keeps bumping the back of my seat,
driving me nuts. I move, problem solved and I can go back to enjoying the movie without simmering about what is bothering me.

That is why I stay at home and subscribe to Netflix. I hate the talking, the munching and the feet on the seats. Totally distracting and takes away from the enjoyment.

For the life of me I cannot understand the mentality of a person paying good money for a ticket to a movie and then proceeding to talk through the movie, or txt their friends or whatever else they're doing. It's nuts (and it drives *me* nuts). Which is why I don't go to the movies any more – why would I pay to see a movie and not be able to enjoy the experience? I'd rather rent a DVD (and it's cheaper).

However, it seems plenty of people will happily shell out money to go to a movie screening and... not pay the slightest bit of attention to the product they paid to see. Could these be the same people with a mountain of debt that they never really seem to get under control? Maybe there's a study in there for someone.

I haven't been in a movie theater for 20 years for these very reasons. Our society has become extremely rude and self centered. When someone tells a person they are rude, our society stands behind the rude person. Read some of the responses, people out there support rudeness.

As decent people we need to stand up to the pond scum society again.

I think going to the movies is a bit like going to a concert. It's a group activity with all it's good and bad points. Sometimes I find the laughter of other people in the theatre can make me laugh all the more. Or the teary eyes of fellow movie goers makes me feel better about my own emotional response. These days we have other options. Why not get a DVD and stay home if it's too much.

Why bother to go???

I have not been to a movie theater for over 20 years. Got disgusted with the other peoples rudeness. Now watch what I want via CD's, TV, computer etc in my own home with no hassle, no noise, no neighbors, and on, and on and on.

Just peace and quiet with the movie.

Len..

I stopped going to the cinemas several years ago. I'm a teacher and I feel that the cinemas have become like out of control classrooms. Teenagers have taken over the multi-plexes and wander in and out of whatever is showing. No one checks the tickets. There is no monitoring for something as simple as that. Besides the teenagers, the folks on cellphones or just checking messages are also a big pain. It's just not worth the aggravation of siting through all this disturbance knowing you've paid a premium to do so. Netflix and other good DVD distributors are a great thing for those of us who want to "escape" to the movies.

I have almost never had a problem in France. Now that I think of it, I don't remember the least time I had a problem in Canada either – although in Canada i usually go to the afternoon shows, so maybe that doesn't count.

I do think though that people should not take this lying down; On the few occasions where I have been been bothered by people talking, I simply say in a stern voice "Could you stop talking, please? You are no longer in your living room." That has always worked.
As for people jabbing you in the back, generally a word or two suffices – same in planes! Sometimes I think people are so engrossed in the movie that they don't realize that they are creating a problem for the person in front of them... except for teenagers, of course. they delight in the fact that other people are irritated.

I can deal with most disturbances in the cinema but the most annoying are from people who decide to use some function on their phone so the back light switches on (visible to everyone behind them) and you completely snap out of the 'zone' you are in while watching the film.

It is not just cinemas. It is the whole idea of people not caring about other people. Who raised these people who just think about themselves and do as they please without thinking about people around them?
Granted some people are chronic complainies and will complain if they hear the noise of opening a candy bar wrap or someone who makes a brief whisper about the film.
So there are two sides to this argument.

This is why I started downloading.

Don't care if cinemas think I'm stealing, they're stealing money from me by not providing a good atmosphere.

Wifey and I have had our share of annoying people at the cinema. Thank goodness for DVD players! Now we can watch films in the privacy of our home, although we will have to wait for a film's DVD release; Sure the kids annoy us with their requests for popcorn buit, hey, it's not a perfect world.

I utterly and totally agree. I now either avoid theatres altogether or wear earplugs during the entire film as I did for Mummy 3 as the noise levels were above the film sound even.
I'm in Belgium here and our local theatre has a new shop now where you can buy hugs chips bags, popcorn, SALADS and Sandwiches (in a bloody theatre of all places!!) and everything makes so much noise. And the issue comes almost never from the children, it's always the adults. The theatre does not care, as long as they sell sell sell sell they don't care what the results are....

I no longer go to the cinema in Nice because of allof that : I read a lot and buy DVDs.

It is worse in very small space ...

The worst place I've been to movies is the Philippines.seems they go there to talk and stand up in front of you. The best place I"ve been is Thailand, first thing I noticed is everyone actually turns off his mobile. next they all stand and pay respect to the king.

A few weeks ago a man spent the entire Quantum of Solace texting, and when I said to him at the end of the movie "Excuse me, but it is very distracting and rude to use your cell phone during a movie" his reply was "Don't expletive preach to me buddy". I have to wonder what possibly makes someone so entirely self centered that they could act or respond in such a way.

Quantum of Solace, 2008, Beirut movie theatre. We're all well set in our comfy chairs, focusing on the great opening italian scene, when two men argue about their seats. Loudly. It's Beirut, I know, but no, no shotguns were fired in the theatre (joke). But the guys were literally shouting. The audience reacted, the men (yes, two men... not boys) finally managed to sit down after 3 minutes. I had lost the adrenaline rush which I supposed to experience from that chasing opening scene. No worries. Enough adrenaline on the streets of Beirut.
Then comes in the middle of the movie, what I like to call, movie-moths. The theatre is blind-dark, the screen is the only thing you are focusing on, when suddenly, a bored member of the audience (usually a woman) opens her mobile – thus lightens up her face and the room in this dark-blind room – to write a message. Even though she sits about 10 rows in front of me, if I could force myself, I could read her text. Then after sending the text, she waits for the reply of course, an dthe exchange continues. It is not usually fun to have a giant screen in front of you asking for your focus, and little lights in the audience diverting your eye focus. Especially when minute action details require your attention on the screen.
So nick, do you have a copyright on your flyer... or could I use it in Arabic?

go to the movies in japan, they behave brilliantly

A 'Gold Class' cinema near us had a solution to those crackling wrappers...they served them in bowls ( didn't sort out the loud chompers though!). Don't you think it's quite amazing that folks have to stuff themselves so full of junk food inorder to 'enjoy' a movie?

Re the mobile phone /sms thing....ushers could collect all phones prior to entry to the cinema, return them on exit. Doses of valium etc could be dished out to those persons unable to cope with the separation anxiety.

drive-ins would be the answer.by the way,do drive-ins also show those movies that you need to wear some pair of 3D eye wear?

tambua,hamisi,kenya.

I just bring my illegally powerfull laserpointer that takes out your sight for 10-20 minutes....

I also like to watch my movies in peace and quiet. Children should not be at evening shows and everyone else should shut up and listen to what's up there on screen. When I was a kid they hired young people to keep an eye on things to make sure people didn't act up. They no longer do that and it's not a good thing. It's just plain rude and if people want to talk or anything else they should do it outside the threatre.

Three letters: DVD...

I totally agree. It's bad enough that one must spend so much money on a commercial movie that's barely adequate. Then the noise starts around me as if people are at home watching tv. It's the same with cell phones. I really don't want to listen to a private conversation, publicly! I do a lot of staring myself in the theatre...it rarely works!

I no longer go to movie theaters. I can't stand people ruining the experience every single time: Parents who impose violent and noisy movies to their scared kids, people who have to use the cell phones in front of me, thus distracting me with the lit screen, or others chit-chatting on their cell phones and who think the rule of shutting the damn thing doesn't apply to them, those who discuss the whole film while it's playing, etc. I can't take it anymore. I rent movies and watch them in the comfort of my home. The experience is far greater.

Back in 1997 was the last time i went to movie theater , after my last visit i was sick with nastiest flu you could possibly imagine . To make thinks worst it was flop of a movie ( don't remember the name ) , the audience was horde of wild primates in ecstasy from food binge . Small wonder that there are complaints that seats in theaters are too small for lots of movie goers .

My idea of the perfect movie theater: A large warehouse divided into a hundred living rooms, with decent seating that is well maintained, plus small tables scattered around for drinks and food. Each living room would accomodate 2 to 3 people, or 5 to 10 people. Each living room contains a large flat screen TV. Dinner can be ordered and delivered.

You would rent the room for the length of the movie. It might cost a little more than a current movie ticket (which are way overpriced), but I'd rather my fantasy than the current reality any day.

I'll never forget the time I was in a theater watching an "R" rated film, and I couldn't keep track of the story line because of 2 kids that were running up and down the aisles. They stopped when asked, but then always started again. Plus someone had a crying baby in the theater. The child cried through the whole film. None of these people seemed to understand that their behavior might be making for a less than enjoyable experience for the rest of us.

I've seen several films (American; original language) in South Korea and one thing I loved was the assigned seating. The first time I bought tickets, the cashier turned her screen toward me to show me the layout of the theater and which seats were available. Very cool. Also, the audience was quiet and respectful.

I saw the Simpsons Movie in Paris and just as several folks on here pointed out, the French are incredibly respectful and quiet throughout the movie. Except for the appropriate laughing of course... even during the jokes that poke fun at France!

Nick, The Mitchells here from London & New York wanted to chime in to say we fully agree with you that certain members of an audience can ruin the cinema experience. I saw Twilight last week with a couple and their three toddlers - the former seemed to want free babysitting and the poor kids didn't understand or want to learn about the vampires. But even though we support your argument, we also feel we must say we agree with previous commentators that you are a grumpy granddad - we know from personal experience after all!

I completely sympathise with you on all your points and share in your frustration. However, I've found a solution (admittedly not ideal, but it works).
I very rarely see a film on opening weekend and let a week or so go by (depending on popularity). Then, I choose the late, late viewing (i.e. nothing before 10:45 pm). This way the audience size is small and consists mainly of quiet (and too-tired-to-cause-much-disturbance) adult couples.
One shouldn't have to go to such lengths to see a film properly, but until there is a return to civilisation, this will have to do...

All obvious irritations aside (talking people, cell phones, crunching food and spilled drinks), I had one of my strangest and most blood-boiling cinema experiences while watching "Savage Grace". Being shown in a theatre that often shows the more "independent" movies and it being a weekday afternoon, I did not expect any talking people. Thank heavens there were none. A small audience, mostly retired people, everyone was perfectly quiet. One of the best times I had in the cinema, being able to enjoy the movie at its fullest.

To my horror, only four minutes before the ending, the woman in the other end of my row gets up, grabs her back and glass of wine (this cinema still serves glasses of wine – that's how "indy" it is) and walks out. Instead of taking the backdoor, she walks past the screen, blocking the view for the other members of the audience, at the climax of the movie!

The only question I was left with was: "why? Why did she get up just before the end of the movie instead of waiting with the rest of us before the movie was over?" It did not ruin the experience of watching the movie, but it certainly distracted for a moment.

Well, my opinion is this: once you have paid for the ticket you have your rights not to be bothered inside. If it happens you go ahead and lodge your complaints. Certainly someone will take the necessary steps.Don´t be shy!

For those who are suggesting for the irritated people to watch DVDs:

A movie screening that goes by without any interruption beats watching a DVD any given Sunday. When I go to the movies, I pay my 7 euros (student discount, yay!) for the experience – for the magic of the silver screen. The idiots with cellphones and crackling popcorn are the ones who should be watching DVDs.